Poly Momma

Happy New Year, readers! (I probably should have posted this last month, but at least it’s still the first week of 2016.)

This year was an adventure in new beginnings and false starts. I moved to a new city full of new dating opportunities and job prospects only to find that none of these panned out the way I had hoped they would. In the end, it meant I was closer to defining exactly what it is I want and what I am worth.

I don’t want to re-hash specific relationships, but there were some stand-out experiences. I met several people on OkC. One I had an excellent first date with, then by the third wanted nothing to do with him. The others ranged from “meh, not too bad” to “I THINK I AM IN LOVE.” I dated more than one person I didn’t meet online, which is a rarity for me, and even though they ended up fizzling rather quickly, I’m proud of myself for asking them out at all. Finally, I was contacted by someone who I never expected to hear from again and whose presence in my life is a surprising and exciting treat.

I learned that it is not worth staying in a crappy job if I can’t stand the people I work with, and it’s ok to stand up for myself. I learned that I deserve better from a first date than, “Yeah, this person isn’t too bad I guess.” If there’s not an affinity that makes me fluttery and flushed, then I’m probably not going to feel that way by date three. I learned that when searching for jobs, it pays to be persistent and actually talk to people in person. I regained confidence that I am still an attractive, sexy, funny person deserving of love. I learned that Sydney, despite having more schools, is a saturated market for teachers. I learned how to break up with someone succinctly and politely. I learned, once again, that I should not get involved with people in ‘somewhat open’ relationships. I finally felt like it was ok to really want someone, to truly desire them, and that it was ok to tell them I did. I also remembered that it’s pretty great to be desired too. By the end of the year, I took control of my mental health, my love life and my career.

It’s been a difficult year for more reasons than the ones above and next year could be harder. But I am coming through stronger and more complete. I literally crawled through mud, faced my fears and found out what I was made of. Next year will be a piece of cake. Or not. Either way, I’ll make it count.